Blogging for clicks.

Matt, co-owner of Central Ohio Music here.

Since our website is pretty new, I am wanting to bump us higher in Google search results. Wix, our website host, recommends that I start blogging regularly to help increase site traffic - the idea being that more content on the site gives more keywords and content for search engines to find. The point of the blog, in their view, is not to generate meaningful and engaging content for all you good people on the internet, but rather to generate content for content's sake. To that end, Wix has an A.I. generator that will automatically write blogs and populate them with keywords to help drive site traffic.

Having an A.I. bot write blog post for me is something I refuse to do. It is demeaning to both the website owner and and the audience and serves only fill the internet with meaningless garbage with no purpose other than to further commercialize and dumb-down our society.

That said, I need site traffic so I can pay my rent, so here comes the meaningless commercial garbage - a keyword salad lovingly and thoughtfully written by me:

This is a guitar.

Guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar guitar.

Not just guitar, however, but also piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano

Not a guitar - a piano.

piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano

piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano

piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano piano.

This is all starting to read a lot like a Gertrude Stein poem. Congratulations if you have made it this far. If you are not familiar with Gertrude Stein's poems, look them up - they are terrible.

Music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons

It's our logo... music lessons!

music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons. Seriously, reading Gertrude Steins poems feels like having someone say something stupid and then call YOU stupid when you don't agree. It's like gaslighting for the literature-inclined. Music lessons music lessons music lessons music lessons.

This picture is public domain. Google likes pictures, and I'm going to tell Google this is a picture of a ukulele... An ukulele? Let me know if any one knows if it's "a" or "an."

Ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele ukulele.

Ukulele. Gertrude Stein is public domain as well. Here's an excerpt: "Light curls very light curls have no more curliness than soup. This is not a subject." Doesn't that sound like the dialogue a science fiction writer would give to a robot with a dying battery? It's like she was taking dictation from a drunken ESL student. Ukulele.

I suppose it's not fair to deride Gertrude Stein, after all, her poetry does have cadence and plays around with sound and imagery and maybe that's the point - not to sully the purity and beauty of the language with the burden of literal meaning and grammar. Rather than try to engage with it on an intellectual level, maybe I need to take a more passive approach - to sit back and let the poetry happen to me and immerse myself in a purely sensory experience. Lets try it with some more keywords I need to use on my site:

This blows.

Kazoo. Cordoba kazoo.

Guild and guitars piano having music guitar teacher theory.

Singing Spector strings voice lessons at La Bella when group classes private lessons with bass guitar bass and mandolin music takes sheet music always acoustic.

Flat wound flat GHS strings pick Dunlop

Slides and Capos.

Blackstar amplifiers Korg hammer action

Natural hammer action piano weighted keyboard.

Dreadnought OM used guitar concert

Jumbo acoustic and classical cedar.

I really and truly hate this. You know what, I think it's possible to play around with sounds and imagery without having to subject an audience to an aggressively incomprehensible word salad, like say, every other writer in the history of mankind. If I want to not understand what I'm reading just because I like the sound, I'll read Pablo Neruda, thanks.

Just in case I haven't fully alienated whatever readers this blog has left:

I just threw all this stuff on the floor and took a picture. Let's not pretend it's art.

Guitar store. Music Store. Music School. London. Columbus. Springfield. Dayton. Urbana. Mt. Sterling. Mechanicsburg. West Jefferson. Plain City. Harmony. Madison County. Clark County. Franklin County. Fayette County. Union County. Central Ohio. Guild guitars. Cordoba Guitars. Classical Guitars. Spector basses. D'Addario Strings. Dunlop picks. GHS strings. La Bella strings. Just because you moved to Paris, that doesn't make you an artist, Gertrude. I read the Emporer's New Clothes so I don't have to entertain the notion that what you do is good. Acoustic guitars. Used guitars. Consignment. Mel Bay. Hal Leonard. Alfred Music. Piano Pronto. Guitar repair. Luthier.

My god, an internet server somewhere is crying over this mess. I'm not sure how much electricity it takes for this blog post to exist, but I know it isn't none. I promise to do some GOOD blog posts in the future, but Wix is really stressing quantity over quality so prepare yourselves for more of this kind of thing on occasion.

Happy strumming,

Matt